Funny Facebook Quotes and Sayings

Check this collection of funny Facebook quotes with pictures. Archive of the best, funny, silly and witty Facebook quotes and sayings statuses and picture quotes. Check your collection and find a funny Facebook status to use for yourself.

Being popular on Facebook is like sitting at the cool table in a cafeteria at a Mental Hospital.

Facebook should have a button that says ‘in a flirtationship’ because it seems like that’s all there ever is anymore.

Facebook is asking, ‘What’s on your mind?’ but I think ‘Who’s on your mind?’ is a better question.

If you friend request me on Facebook and your profile picture is a car, I will assume you’re a transformer.

Roses are red, Facebook is blue. No mutual friends, so who the fuck are you ?

You don’t have to like me, I’m not a Facebook status.

The only reason why 30 guys liked your picture is because they can see right down your shirt.

Quitting Facebook is the new, adult version of running away from home. We all know you’re doing it for attention and we all know that you’ll be back!!

Some people need to realize that Facebook is a social network, not a diary.

Who needs television when you have so much drama on Facebook.

Facebook is proof that the world is terminally bored.

Face your problem, not Facebook it.

The Poke option is okay, but when is Facebook going to come out with a Punch option?

Facebook is like a fridge. You keep checking it, but there’s nothing good.

Facebook, please. I’m Trying to work! Check Me! Check Me !!

I won’t block you or delete you. I’m keeping you there so you will be able to see how happy I am without you.

Oh, you’re popular on Facebook? That’s cool. I mean, these days it’s easy to have 1,500 friends that you’ve never met before.

You should have two Facebook accounts. One for each face.

Facebook should have a limit on how many times you can change your relationship status. After 3 it should default to ‘Unstable’.

Sorry Facebook, you keep saying you’ve changed, but it’s too late. I’m already in love with someone else and his name is twitter.

Facebook is kind of like prison. You spend all day staring at walls and getting poked by people you don’t know.

I’m sorry that I’m not updating my Facebook status, my cat ate my mouse.

Say it to my face, not through your status.

I want to make my name on Facebook ‘Nobody’. So when I see someone post something stupid I can like it, and it will say ‘Nobody Likes This’.

You know you are addicted to Facebook when you log off Facebook, turn your computer off, go to bed, role over, and log onto your Facebook from your phone one last time for the night.

There’s life without Facebook and Internet? Really? Send me the link.

Life without music is like Facebook without notifications.

If I liked your status on Facebook, that means u have entertained me.

I wouldn’t need Facebook if there was a website that just told me whether or not my exes got fat.

If she has 500 likes and 500 comments on a picture, what’s missing? Her clothes.

No mutual friends, who the hell are you.

If I’m not on Facebook for more than 2 days… call the police!!!

That urge you get to write ‘no one gives a shit’ on someone’s status.

May your life someday be as awesome as you pretend it is on Facebook.

Face your problems, don’t Facebook them!

Long time ago I used to have a life, until someone told me to create a Facebook account.

Facebook is like a fridge. Even though you know nothing new is going on, you still go and aimlessly check every 10 minutes.

Facebook is obviously from California because it says ‘Like’ so many times.

Facebook is like relationships. Faithful on your walls but cheating in your inbox.

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