A prolonged orgasm is every woman’s dream, but for Amanda McLaughlin, having orgasms is nothing short of a nightmare. Amanda, 23 suffers from a rare condition called Persistent Genital Arousal Disorder (PGAD)—a rare condition that leaves the patient in a state of constant arousal; leading to exhausting trembles and bone-numbing pain throughout her pelvic region for the entire day.
But her grouse is more with people who think her disorder is a joke and don’t take her condition seriously. In an interview with Barcroft TV, she said: “Firstly, I wish that the name [of the disorder] was different. Arousal makes it sound like it’s a fun thing to have.”
But her condition is anything but fun. “I get people saying ‘oh I wish my wife had that’ and thinking it’s a joke. But would they want to have a raging boner 24/7? I don’t think so. It’s just [the pain] is non-stop. It feels like you’re about to have an orgasm and then it never goes away,” she explained when asked what her condition feels like.
PGAD has left her sitting on heated pads with ice inserted inside her vagina all day to help her cope with the vaginal swelling. It all began in 2013 when McLaughlin was diagnosed with the rare condition that left her crippled without a physical impairment.
Unable to go to work or drive, Amanda’s condition has rendered her life useless. “If I could go the rest of my life without having an orgasm, that’s fine,” McLaughlin added.
“Some days I do ok and some days I don’t want to be around anymore. I don’t want anyone to look at me. I don’t usually leave my house. I don’t even want to be on social media. I don’t want to do anything,” she explained.
Prior to her diagnosis, Amanda wasn’t even aware that a disorder like this existed and she was always complaining of pain akin to an orgasm all day. But doctors told her that it was nothing serious and some even claimed it was a sign of sex addiction. She explained: “It was around the time I was 13 or 14 is when I first noticed that there something was wrong. Nobody believed me. I kept saying, ‘I need to have sex. I need to orgasm’,” McLaughlin said. “Between the ages of 15 and 18, I masturbated way more than a normal teenager would. Everybody thought it was a sex addiction.”
Even her mother, Victoria Enriquez did not believe what she said and categorically called her a whore for her ‘depraved behavior’. Victoria said: “I still feel guilty. My daughter was telling me she was in pain and the doctors were saying there was nothing wrong. And I believed them over my child. The whole family thought she was just a whore and I thought she was a hypochondriac or making it up.”
But her diagnosis revealed the truth and Victoria cannot help but feel terrible for doubting her daughter. She said: “It was a huge relief because then there was something—there was validation. She wasn’t lying. She wasn’t making all the stuff up. She’s not a whore and she’s not a sex addict.”
But now, she is only hoping that her daughter gets some respite from her condition. “I really want the diagnosis to mean that she can find a cure,” she stated.
Amanda’s condition has made her vulnerable to severe depression and anxiety because of the intimate nature of PGAD. But in the middle of her life’s hopelessness, did she find love in fiancé Jojo Feller, whom she met a year ago. It hasn’t been easy for Amanda to keep the relationship afloat but Jojo has been nothing short of a savior in her life.
JoJo met Amanda at a mutual friend’s party and she was open with him right from the start. Jojo said: “When she first told me [about the disorder], I didn’t know how to feel about it but I liked her so I was prepared to jump in. I just try to support her and learn as much as I can. The more I can learn, the more I can help her.”
And Amanda is grateful to have an understanding partner like Jojo in her life. She said: “Relationships are really hard to keep with this problem. But he never once judged me, he never made me feel bad about not working.”
But PGAD reared it’s ugly head in their relationship too and Amanda admitted that PGAD has caused some tension in the relationship. At times she has had to beg Jojo for sex to try to relieve her of her pain. But Jojo doesn’t want the element of love to dissipate from sex and turn into a measly chore.
Amanda on her part feels terrible for doing what she does to him. “Sometimes I will be crying and begging him to have sex with me just to relieve some of the pressure that I have down there. And it doesn’t feel great, having to beg your man for sex.”
PGAD has affected their sex life tremendously but Amanda is desperate to make it work. “It affects our sex life very much—you’d think that you could have sex and it would just go away, but it doesn’t.” She is now trying to find a cure and is currently seeing a specialist at Michigan University.
She is taking 30 different medications to help ease her symptoms and also has had procedures to numb her nerves, but any successes so far have been found to be only temporary in nature.
According to the International Society for Sexual Medicine, the causes of PGAD are unclear. For some, the condition appears to be triggered by stress whereas some experts believe it may be tied to psychological issues. PGAD treatment may involve cognitive behavior therapy, stress management, pelvic floor physical therapy and other medications such as an antidepressant, per the Sexual Medicine Society of North America.